


Rekindling

by Rivermoon1970



Category: Criminal Minds (US TV), Elementary (TV), James Bond (Craig movies)
Genre: Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Long-Distance Relationship, M/M, Reunions, Sherlock Being Sherlock, Slash, Talking, talking out problems
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-08-26
Updated: 2017-08-26
Packaged: 2018-12-20 04:13:43
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,667
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11912985
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Rivermoon1970/pseuds/Rivermoon1970
Summary: Aaron Hotchner had met the enigmatic Gresham Holmes when he was a young agent during a transatlantic agent exchange. They had a long-distance relationship for many years, then Foyet almost destroyed everything in Aaron's life, even the best thing he ever had. Now, Gresham, or Q as he has become, wants Aaron back. Can they do it? Can they get over all the hurt and anger to rekindle what they had lost?





	Rekindling

The unexpected surprise of an old lover visiting Hotch at work had him blushing when he introduced the younger man as someone he had met during his liaison with Scotland Yard. They had met in a pub one night as Aaron was missing home, and didn’t want to be in his hotel room. The two men had hit it off rather well and for the three months Aaron was in England, he was in the man’s bed almost every night that he wasn’t on a case. When he got home, he told his wife what happened, their marriage was one of convenience rather than love. They had been best friends since before college, and when he wanted to get into the Bureau, well his orientation at the time was frowned upon. They used each other. Haley enjoyed his status, Aaron enjoyed the anonymity.

What hadn’t been brought up, but was suspected was that Aaron had fallen in love. The man was beautiful, his unruly hair, his green eyes and his quick mind were what attracted Hotch to him in the first place. And, neither of them cared about the age difference. For the first few years they had worked well, seeing each other as often as they could. Hotch taking time to fly to England, his lover would sometimes fly to America. They talked on the phone often and e-mail, then Skype helped to keep them close. Then Foyet happened, and Aaron shut everyone, even Gresham, out of his life. When he came back out of that darkness and tried to contact his lover, Gresham was nowhere to be found. He had disappeared, and Aaron’s heart had broken. It took Aaron a long time to try to get over the loss, he buried the hurt deep inside, not letting anyone else get that close.

After a couple of years, he tried to move on, there was a short affair with Reid, and Aaron knew exactly what that was about. He didn’t need to be told that his attraction to Reid was because he was so like Gresham, but even that fizzled out because there wasn’t anything else between them. It was just sex and while it was enjoyable, Aaron couldn’t keep up the pretense.

Then, out of the blue an encrypted e-mail that only had two words.

_ I’m coming. _

Aaron tried to understand, he thought about having Garcia to look into it, but deep down, he knew who it might have been from. He didn’t want to believe that after three years Gresham was finally coming to see him. He had once again buried those emotions, especially the anger when the man hadn’t shown up at Haley’s funeral. He had needed his lover, and he wasn’t there.

When Q walked through the doors of the BAU Aaron’s knees almost buckled, his heart rate sped up and he knew his pulse was jumping, though on the outside he was calm and he wore his stoicism like a shield. 

“Hello Aaron,” Q said as he walked right up to him and kissed him full on the mouth in front of everyone. To say he was shocked was nothing compared to his co-workers around him.

“Gresham…” Normally Aaron wasn’t at a loss for words when it was important, and this moment was most assuredly important, but he was rendered speechless.

“I think we have a lot to talk about.”

Almost like a bucket of ice water had been thrown on him, those words brought him back to reality almost immediately.

“Yes, we do. But not here.” His clipped words had everyone turning and staring at him, knowing that tone well the team backed away and went about their business. They did not want to get in the middle of whatever it was that had Aaron angry.

“I didn’t figure you would want to have this conversation with your colleagues around. Shall we?”

Aaron looked at the stunned faces around him and couldn’t help the smirk that formed on his lips.

“Well, since it’s slow and we don’t have a case, files can be done tomorrow, everyone take off.” Aaron grabbed Q’s hand and started towards the doors. As they were leaving they ran into Emily, who looked shocked.

“Q?”

“Emily Prentiss. It is good to see you once again. I’m afraid I can’t stay to chat, but I am here for a few days. It would be lovely to get together,” Q said as he and Hotch were stepping into the elevator, and before she could say anything the doors were closing.

“You know each other from Interpol?”

“Yes. I did some contract work for them.”

Aaron wanted to say more, so much more, but he couldn’t, not within the walls of the FBI. He would wait till they were someplace quiet.

The car and driver that were waiting was not what he expected.

“Gresh, you didn’t need to do this. I could have driven us to my place.”

“No, we are going to neutral territory where neither of us can make a scene. I did research and found a proper pub in DC. Then and only then will we talk.”

Aaron went to say more, but the driver was holding the door open for him, then Q.

It didn’t take long for the driver to take them to the address that Q had rattled off. Aaron knew that address, but he had stayed away, too many memories of England and those three months, and the years in-between. He stepped out of the car and felt that anger simmering just underneath and knew that Q had been right. Neither of them were likely to make a scene in a public place like this and he very much wanted to make a scene.

After they found a quiet booth and ordered drinks did any type of conversation between them begin.

Aaron looked down into his ale and took a deep breath. He tamped down his anger and knew he needed to make an apology.

“I’m sorry Gresh. I...I didn’t mean to push you away and I was so angry when you didn’t show up at the funeral. I needed you…” Aaron took a long drink of his ale as those old hurts and feelings welled up inside him. “I needed you there. It shouldn’t have mattered what was between us at the time, and I thought you knew me better. I thought we were stronger than we, obviously, were.” Aaron put his glass down and frowned at it to stem the tide of emotion that he was having trouble getting a handle on.

“I know and I will always regret leaving you alone. I should have ignored you being an utter git and come anyway. I am sorry Aaron. There were things going on with my family at the same time and I was trying to make the best decisions I could. I had assumed you had your friends with you.”

Aaron snorted out an unamused laugh as he took another drink.

“They were, then they got called away for a case and the only one I had was Jack. I couldn’t lean on my five year old.”

“Bloody hell,” Q spat out and closed his eyes. Aaron could feel the guilt pouring off him, but he wasn’t going to help him with that. Not yet at least.

“What kept you away?” Aaron looked up and he couldn’t help wrapping Unit Chief Hotchner around him like the shield that it often was. He knew he looked cold and flat, but he wanted explanations.

“I should have gotten word to you to let you know what was going on. My brother, Mycroft, he got himself in a lot of trouble and I had to help him out. Then Sherlock, well, Sherlock is a whole different matter. His lover was killed and he spiraled into depression and drugs. I had to make a choice between my lover and my brother. It was an impossible choice Aaron and it tears me up thinking that I even had to make it. However, it doesn’t excuse me not being there for you, even it it was to get word on what was going on. He’s in New York now and I will be going to see him when I leave here.”

Aaron frowned, “You’re already thinking of leaving?” He tried to keep the anger out of his voice, but he couldn’t. Gresham had hurt him deeply.

“No, oh, god no. Just a quick trip to New York and back. Of course that all depends on what happens tonight.”

“What do you want to happen? And can we really go back Gresh? I get it, you had to help your brothers, but you disappeared. I couldn’t find you anywhere. For fucks sake, I loved you and it hurt when you chose to ignore me.” Aaron was trying to fight himself as he rubbed a hand down his face to stave off the tears that gathered in the corners of his eyes threatening to fall.

Q was silent for a long moment as he looked down into his drink and tried to find the right words.

“I admit I was angry when you pushed me away. I wasn’t thinking of you and what you were going through. I only thought of how hurt I was. Then I got an offer. MI6. They would help my brother on the caveat that I become their new Quartermaster. I took the job because I wanted to disappear. I wanted to forget. I know what we had wasn’t perfect, we work all the time, in fact we’re both married to our jobs, but christ Aaron, I love you. And some things have happened in the last few weeks that made me realize just how much I love you, and I want you back. I want  _ us  _ back.”

Aaron’s breath hitched as he took a chance and reached across the table and twined their fingers together. He felt even more fragile than he had at Haley’s funeral, when he had felt so alone.

“I’ve changed Gresh. I don’t know if you’ll even like who I am. I know I’ve become more serious and I’ve put up walls. I can’t love you again and get hurt like that again, I can’t. You meant everything to me and I was so alone.” Aaron still refused to let the tears in his eyes fall. He needed to be strong.

Q slipped out of the booth he was in and slid into the one with Aaron and pulled him close. He wrapped his arms around the older man and held him.

“I can’t make promises. Not with some of the things happening in the agency, but I won’t ever hurt you like that again. I’ve changed also, but I want...no, I need to know if there is a chance. If  _ we _ have a chance.”

“I have Jack, Gresham. He doesn’t remember much about you. Only sometimes he asks where my special friend is.”

“I want to get to know him again. I have missed him too.”

“What do you want Gresh?”

“You. I want you Aaron.”

Aaron’s breath hitched and he made a decision right there. He leaned in and pressed his lips against Q’s and kissed him with all of the longing he had been feeling for his lover. It was so tender, and loving that it almost made Q tear up. After they pulled away, Q stood and held out his hand for Aaron.

Aaron knew this was a defining moment. If he took Q’s hand it would be taking a chance on opening his heart back up to possible heartache. But, Aaron had missed him terribly. There were several long moments where indecision warred within him, but he looked into those impossibly green eyes and knew he would fall at Q’s feet, no matter what was between them.

It wasn’t long before they were at Aaron’s apartment, which he was surprised that was where Q wanted to go. 

“Jess still has Jack, we won’t be disturbed.” Aaron said as he let them inside. He was nervous because he wasn’t sure exactly what was going to happen. He toed off his shoes, then walked to his bedroom to hang up his jacket and put away his tie and cufflinks. He was just taking off his shirt to throw into the dry cleaning when he felt hands on his back. There was a time he ached for that touch and his breath caught in his throat when he felt those oh so familiar hands touching him. When they began to come around him, Aaron caught those hands in his.

“Gresh…” Aaron hadn’t been naked in front of anyone since his attack.

“Don’t hide Aaron. If we are to get back any part of what we had you can’t hide from me.” Q laid his hands on Aaron’s shoulder and gently turned him around. Aaron looked to the side, he didn’t want Q to see just how vulnerable he felt. When two fingers were placed under his chin and his face turned he saw the gentle smile on Q’s face. 

“You are just as beautiful as you always have been Aaron Hotchner. And nothing has changed my opinion.”

Aaron wrapped his arms around Q and pulled him close, he dipped his head down and kissed him. Fingers gently moved over his chest, stopping on each scar and outlining them as he kept kissing Q. Pulling slightly away he let his forehead connect with Q’s and took a breath.

“If we do this, if we start this again, I can’t lose you again Gresh. Dammit, I still love you, I tried to let you go.” Aaron let out a shaky breath and bussed a kiss on Q’s forehead. “I just couldn’t. Please stay.”

Q looked up and smiled softly. He cupped Aaron’s cheek and tipped up to kiss him again. He backed Aaron up towards the bed and when Aaron fell back onto it, he followed, still kissing the man he loved. It didn’t take much for them to strip each other of their clothing and Aaron scooted up to lay down properly. Q took in the sight of him like a man that had been in the desert too long. Kneeing up between Aaron’s legs he bent down and kissed every scar on his lover’s chest and stomach. Guilt twisted inside him for letting Aaron deal with all of this on his own. He thought about Bond and their affair. How he used the 00 to try to forget, then how he felt when he saw the bloody bastard driving off with Madeline. It gave Q a little perspective on what he had done to the man that he had left behind.

“I’m sorry Aaron. I’m so sorry.” Q laid his head down on Aaron’s shoulder as he wrapped around him. Aaron wrapped his arms around Q and held him. He had a feeling that they weren’t quite ready for sex. The both of them were too vulnerable. They needed to take the time to work their way back to what they had been. 

“I think we need to stop apologizing. You’re here, now. Let’s start by moving forward and finding that middle ground we used to have.”

“I would like that, Aaron.”

The rest of the night was spent talking. Aaron had made tea. Q was impressed that he still remembered how to make a proper cuppa. Aaron just smiled as he sipped at his black coffee, making Q roll his eyes. 

“Come with me, Aaron.”

“I’m sorry?” 

“New York. Come with me. Meet Sherlock. Let’s spend a couple of days just the two of us.”

Aaron took a few moments to think it over. He was owed annual leave and he had not taken any. He would have to talk to Jessica into keeping Jack over the weekend, but Aaron wanted this. He was determined to make it happen.

* * *

Aaron and Q walked up to the brownstone and knocked on the door. The noise coming from inside the residence had Aaron a little worried, as did the harried look of the woman who opened the door.

“I’m sorry, can I help you?” She asked as she looked both Aaron and Q.

Aaron tried not to profile the woman, he really did, but he couldn’t always shut it off.

“I’m Gresham Holmes, and this Aaron Hotchner. Sherlock was supposed to be expecting us.”

“OH! Right, come on in.” The woman smiled then turned and walked through the house, “ _ Sherlock!”  _ She yelled making Q and Aaron look at each other wondering just what was going on as they moved further into the house. When they got to the living room, Aaron was struck by the controlled chaos of the place. Again his profiler sense went haywire. 

“Hmm, do try not to profile him right away, love.” Q laughed at the blush that creeped up on Aaron’s face.

“I will do my best,” the cheeky smile he gave Q made the younger man laugh.

“He’ll be down in a minute. Would you two like some coffee or tea?”

“Thank you, coffee would be great.”

“Tea, for me.” 

“Let’s go down to the kitchen. I’m Joan Watson, by the way.”

“Ah yes, the woman that helps Sherlock with his consulting.” Q folded himself in a chair with Aaron next to him.

“I do. Sherlock had never mentioned you before. Of course he had never mentioned Mycroft either till he had just showed up in New York.”

“Mm, yes. Our family is rather complicated. Father liked to force competition between us…”

“And Gresham refused to play. He preferred his computers, but considering he is brilliant at it, I can’t blame him.” Sherlock walked in the room just after Watson laid out tea and coffee. Sherlock poured coffee for himself, then a cup for Aaron, while Watson poured tea for her and Q.

“It was preferable to the constant battle of wills between you and Mycroft. I heard Father was here in New York.”

“Yes, well as with anything with our Father, that is complicated.”

“I know, Sherlock. Don’t you think I haven’t kept tabs on him?” Q sipped his tea as he sat back, crossed his legs and put up his defenses. Aaron cupped the back of his neck knowing this was an emotional minefield for his lover.

“I don’t doubt that you do. But, I would rather not ruin this afternoon with talk of the man. I want to get to know the person you ran away from.” Sherlock swung his gaze over to Aaron. “Dresses nice even when on vacation. You have money, but you don’t show it off. You’re demeanor tells me that you work in law enforcement, but not a detective, higher up the food chain so to speak. You were married, but the tan around where the ring sat is fading…”

“Sherlock! I told him not to profile you, please be courteous and not do the same to him.” Q glared daggers at his brother and Aaron got a little more insight into his lover. Especially when Sherlock nodded.

“I apologize. Some habits really are hard to break and making sure my brother is happy, that is something I will never stop doing.”

“I understand. Yes, I do work in law enforcement. FBI, actually. The BAU’s critical response team. The Unit Chief.”

“Profiler,” Sherlock almost, not quite, but almost sneered.

“You have a problem with profilers, Mr. Holmes?”

“I have a problem that the science you use is unproven. There are very few quantifiable scientific certainties that  you deal in. At best you use tried and true detective work, at worst you rely on junk science.”

Aaron smiled wide and Q just looked at him like he was crazy.

“He needs to meet Spencer. I think they would get along brilliantly.”

“You would unleash my brother on Dr. Reid?”

“Oh no, I’d unleash Dr. Reid on your brother.” Aaron chuckled when he saw the confused look on Sherlock’s face. Aaron got the impression from Watson that she was more than amused by the interchange.

“I offend you and you laugh?” Sherlock’s confusion just made Aaron smile even more.

“Mr. Holmes, I’ve dealt with worse in my line of work. My unit goes after serial killers. If I got offended by everyone who didn’t believe in what we do, I wouldn’t be able to do my job as successfully as we do.”

“Sherlock, why don’t you change and we can go to lunch. Our reservations are at one.” Watson stood and prodded the man upstairs, who went with very little protest.

“I’m sorry, Aaron.”

“Don’t be. It isn’t anything I haven’t dealt with before. He is just trying to protect you, Gresh. I know the feeling well.”

Q smiled shyly and Aaron pulled him closer and kissed him. 

“I believe in us, you know. I always have. It doesn’t matter what anyone else thinks. I’m putting what happened behind us, because this, you wanting me to meet your family, it means something, Gresham. That more than anything tells me you want it as well.”

Q slid into Aaron’s lap and laid his head on Aaron’s shoulder. 

“I do, Aaron.” 

In the stairwell and out of sight of the two lovers Sherlock and Watson were watching the intimate exchange.

“See that, Sherlock? They love each other. I don’t know what happened, but it looks to me as if they are putting their past behind them and moving forward. Now stop being an ass to Aaron.”

Sherlock took a breath and smiled a small tight smile to himself.

“One day I will tell you, but you are right, Watson. I will give Aaron a chance because my brother deserves to be happy. At least one of us has done something right.”

Back in the kitchen, Aaron closed his eyes and curled his fingers in Q’s hair, holding him close and vowing to never let go again.

**Author's Note:**

> I played with the idea of pairing Sherlock and Spencer. If there is enough interest I might revisit this AU and see what I could do with that. It is the Elementary version. I have issues with the BBC version, but Benedict dose do an amazing job. I just like Johnny Lee's portrayal a little more.


End file.
